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It's your first birthday in heaven...


As you celebrate it with Jesus
And all the angels sing
Blow those gold candles
Over that silver white cake,
We are sending  you our love
And special prayers too...

Happy birthday in heaven Pang.
We love and miss you... 
More than words can ever say.

Heartbroken

It’s been a month and two weeks since our most recent trip to the Philippines. I wish I could tell you how excited we were. Unfortunately, it was an unplanned trip. Too unexpected.

I was in the office that Friday afternoon when I received the bad news. Papang was brought to the hospital. I breathe deeply and got back to work hoping that another email will come soon assuring me that he’s ok. As much as I wanted to convince myself that everything will be alright, I was rather fearful of what could possibly happen.

When I finally got to the apartment, I called Mamang but the update on Papang’s condition wasn’t getting any better. At that moment, I was determined to go home and be with my family come what may. I was perplexed, too confused with what’s happening and totally shocked. I knew I needed to pray but I did not know the right words to say. Tears just flooded my eyes non stop.

My sister together with my siblings-in-law met us at the airport. I squeezed her tight- uncertain who needs that hug the most. When we finally got to talking about Papang’s condition, she held my hand and told me that he passed the night before. I was helpless, I did not make it in time. It broke my heart like never before…

The pain has never gone since then. And I remain doubtful this will ever go. 


I miss Papang. I know I will forever do.